Ryan Wilson
- Feb 22, 2017
- 3 min read

The Power of Connection

If you’ve been paying attention to the wisdom on here, you will already know just how important it is for us to feel CONNECTED. It is irrefutable how important HEALTHY TRIBE is to our wellbeing. In fact, it’s one of the top-heavy two on our list of “5 Things We Need To Be Well”.

As Dr. E. A. Wilson explains in her previous post “What Do YOU DO To Feel SEEN”;

“We are biologically hard-wired to be social, to want to be seen and acknowledged. Because we evolved to be a SOCIAL SPECIES, we NEED a feeling of belonging in the same way we need food and water for survival.”

There’s simply no denying it; in order to be our best selves – we need to show up and be seen by others who will see us, hear us, and treat us like we matter.

Okay, so, I’m convinced. Now what? An eye gaze challenge you say?! I cringe. My thoughts race; are you kidding me?! No way! I can’t do that! I’m shaking, sweating, and failing to meet my partner’s eyes for more than two seconds at a time.

Shouldn’t getting something I need so badly, something I need to survive and thrive, be easier than this?? If this is a good thing why do I feel so bad!? If I want to get my needs met, why am I not glaring into my partner’s eyes with a starved intensity to suck out every ounce of connection I can? Apparently, it doesn’t work that way. Just because it’s right, doesn’t mean it’s easy. It’s not comfortable to put yourself out there. It’s not easy to show up, speak up, and be witnessed. It’s extremely vulnerable and takes a tremendous amount of courage.

Clearly, I am no master of connection. It is, however, my biggest goal right now. These stories I relay of my own experiences are not challenges I have overcome – they are challenges I’m overcoming. I have made the choice to fully commit to showing up and going for it. Accepting the discomfort, embracing the fears, and taking every opportunity to work on connecting. In fact, I’ve developed a workshop to do just that.

I know some people (my inner bully included) may believe I’m not fit to be a facilitator of a workshop on connection; however, I think I might just be the perfect person for it.

I understand how incredibly difficult, embarrassing, and uncomfortable it is to be seen. I created this workshop to be connection-phobe friendly; to be the best experience it can be for those who want to work on this goal, but who also experience the same dread that I do when it comes to these ‘opportunities’.

I’m not going to act like these challenges are ‘no big deal’. For every challenge I ask of you, we will have time to recover, reflect, and re-engage our parasympathetic nervous system. It is my goal to ensure you feel comforted, safe, and grounded while you take risks to discover the power of connection.

If connection is something you’ve been tackling, wanting to work on, or straight-up avoiding, I implore you to take this opportunity. Show up; not because it’s going to be easy – but because it’s going to be worth it.